A couple fries short of a Happy Meal

My cousin thinks he’s a genius because he knows how to text. Stupid as a bag of broken chips.

She tried to explain quantum physics to a toddler. Stupid as a bag of broken chips.

He wore socks with sandals to a funeral. Stupid as a bag of broken chips.

He tried to dance to a power ballad and failed. Worse than a soggy onion ring.

She cried at a commercial about a sad puppy. Worse than a soggy onion ring.

He brought a sandwich to a pizza party. Worse than a soggy onion ring.

He asked if the moon was made of cheese. Dumber than a fry that fell in the sauce.

She tried to argue with a vending machine. Dumber than a fry that fell in the sauce.

He said he could beat up a dragon with a noodle. Dumber than a fry that fell in the sauce.