A beaver attempt

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7 views · Added 17d ago · 3 definitions

Trying to make a lady happy down below, but it’s like fighting a wild beast in a hairball factory. You quit and take a cab home because you’re too embarrassed to face your friends.

I tried to give her a good time, but it looked like a raccoon had a party in her pubic forest.

He went in for the kill, but came out with a full beard and a headache.

She looked like a jungle had exploded in her lap, so I left and got a pizza.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A lousy try at giving head. Like it was done by a tired toddler with a mouth full of cheese and a broken leg.

He tried to give me head, but it was like a broken record with a mouth full of dirt.

She gave me the worst head I’ve ever had. It was like she was eating a whole sandwich with her face.

He tried to give me a good time, but it was like a dog chewing on a sock.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A burning feeling in your eyes, nose, or throat from trying to seduce a lady and failing so hard, you feel like you’ve been kissed by a fire breathing dragon.

I went south of the border and got hit by a fireball. My eyes felt like they were on fire.

She looked like a hot mess, and I got a nose burn from her bad vibes.

I tried to charm her, but I ended up with a throat burn and a bad case of regret.

by Slangipedia 16d ago